I was always perceived as a kind daughter, a diligent student, graduating from primary school, secondary school, technical university with best marks, heading for foreign internships and nice job, maybe little rebel at teenage time. Everything well planned, well succeeded but after years of daily rush some voice in my head started saying stop, stop, stop. Hold the horses. Nice job for whom? It’s amazing how many people spend their lives living other people expectations, neglecting their own needs and desires (believe me, it is so true here in India!). When I realized I was not truly following my expectations I decided to take a deep breath and change something. Life throwbacks mood.
The coin flipped, I came to India. Between my home city and host city there is just 6800 km in straight line, so once decided there was no returns, no come backs, no time for regrets. I got the courage to pursuit my life the way I dream and I found happiness, love and self-esteem. I cannot say it comes with ease but with conscious and moderate win-win compromise, I can move mountains.
If I could travel time.
When we start unnecessary rush in our daily routine, life gives us a stop sign expressed in a different ways. And recently 2 things came to me like this. First, I came across Bronnie Ware’s name. Australian nurse who was working in palliative care and who spent several years with people who knew their lives would soon end. She made conversations and published a beautiful eye opening testimony. It turns out that people are incredibly maturing when they face their mortality. The clarity occurs about what really matters in life. Patients were scattered throughout the spectrum of various emotions – denials, anger, fear and acceptance. Second, pretty much connected to the first one – myself, I had a dream about my own death. Quite strange feeling as I was not afraid and rather peaceful at that time. This awkward experience literally forced me to think about my life, my family, dreams and hopes.
What if I don’t manage to do what I want to do in life?
What if I do not express my love much enough to the closest people?
What if I do not make it to leave a legacy I want to see at my aged years?
What would I say to myself screening life in my last months? Last weeks? Last days?
What would you say to yourself screening life in your last months? Last weeks? Last days?
I spend some time thinking about this and actually felt guilty not being fully and daily grateful for what I have in life. I understood that most of the time I am chasing after things I am still yet to achieve rather than being thankful of what I already have. How about you? What is the most important for you?
What would I tell my 20 year-old self?
- Life isn’t a sprint, it’s rather a marathon and you’re not in it just to “win”, it’s to enjoy the running itself or the trial we are following. Be kind for yourself. Be messy sometimes. Let it all go. Live and let it go!
- Live your life debt free. In this money ruled world, online facilities, we became slaves for buying, wanting, getting more, possessing more than we have. No use in spending half of your life working for something that you cannot truly enjoy.
- Remember to appreciate your loved ones, find time to be with them and spend time together. Love is the most important value.
- Focus on the positive and that will help you to fight off resentment. Live the regret-free life. There are dozens of ways to simplify your life (to be able to live for less money) or to plan your effective work (to earn more).
So is there anything that I personally regret?
Absolutely nothing. Today I regret nothing about my decisions. I am continuously heading to spend my life the way I always wanted to have. I know what is important to me, what are my values, how to head for the inner harmony. I stopped striving for recognition, followers’ crowd. I fulfilled a declaration and dream that every single second we have a new chance to start fresh.
Life is a matter of choice, indeed! Try it on your skin itself today. And I do wish it for you from the bottom of my heart.